Tales of Christmas Past

The holiday season is here. Decorations are rapidly going up or are up on homes. People going ape shit at the local Walmart trying to get that GI Joe with the Kung Fu grip for their kids. Kids are writing out Christmas lists like their parents write out their wills, telling Santa they want the whole world. Aw yes, it is indeed that time of year....

The Honest Man has some fond memories himself about Christmas. I remember when my parents surprised me with a boombox (yep I'm old school), and the Raising Hell and Orange Juice tapes for me. I also remember getting a Nintendo one year. I even remember the bad years when I got books and clothes as my primary gifts :-). But there is one memory that always sticks in my head and about I'm about to share with my readers.

I was either 8 or 9 yrs old and it was Christmas Eve. Moms had finished making the mandatory sugar cookies for "Santa" so that "he" would have something to eat from doing all that "hard work" in delivering our gifts. My sister and I were doing required viewing aka watching the Fat Albert Christmas special (yep that Fat Albert special, the one that got main sponsorship from Church's chicken back in the day). My Pops was in a jolly mood that evening. I don't know if it was the hellacious amount of egg nog he drank but he really was in like a Cliff Huxtable type mood. He even had on the crazy sweater!

Anyway, it gets cold in South Carolina in the winter. So my Dad had the fireplace going to keep the house warm. Like I said he was feeling giddy. He had actually brought some chestnuts from somewhere and had them on this little platter. He starts walking from the kitchen to the fireplace with the plate, doing his best imitation of Nat King Cole by singing "Chestnuts Rooooassting on an opppeeennn fiiiiireee!" He was still singing when he actually tried to put the chestnuts in the fire. He popped two into the fireplace, those bad boys shot straight back at him in seconds, he quickly dodged and shouted "OH SHIT". He also fumbled the plate of unroasted chestnuts :-).

Today's Lesson

I don't why I remember the silliest shit from my youth but that story does it to me everytime. And if you aren't laughing, my response is either you had to be there or you should try it yourself with people around you and see how they react :-).

My Dad also learned a valuable lesson too. The only roasted nuts he should mess with are the prepackaged ones from Planters. Next year he just baked cookies......